"Damn men, can't live with them, can't kill them unless you have a good place to hide the bodies."

You would most likely have a drunken romp with
Legolas! (Damn those bloody drinking contests)
Whether you regret it in the morning or not, it
should be very pleasurable at the time. Just
beware of the spins! Puking on the poor elf
would probably kill the romance. ;)


What Kind Of Sex Would You Have With Legolas?
brought to you by Quizilla

YOUR PORN STAR NAME:
(NAME OF FIRST PET + STREET YOU LIVE ON)

Oomi Frender

YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME:
(NAME OF YOUR FAVOURITE SNACK FOOD + GRANDFATHERS FIRST NAME)

Ritz Burr

YOUR FASHION DESIGNER NAME:
(FIRST WORD YOU SEE ON YOUR LEFT + FAVOURITE RESTAURANT)

Victoria Sharis

EXOTIC FOREIGNER ALIAS:
(Favorite Spice + Last Foreign Vacation Spot)

Ginger Vancouver

SOCIALITE ALIAS:
(Silliest Childhood Nickname + Town Where You First Partied)

Marge Hamilton

"FLY GIRL" ALIAS (a la J. Lo):
(First Initial + First Two or Three Letters of your Last Name)

H. Mc

ICON ALIAS:
(Something Sweet Within Sight + Any Liquid in the Kitchen)

Danish Coffee

DETECTIVE ALIAS:
(Favorite Baby Animal + Where You Went to High School)

Lamb Klahowya

BARFLY ALIAS:
(Last Snack Food You Ate + Your Favorite Alcoholic Drink)

Cinnamon Twist Champagne

SOAP OPERA ALIAS:
(Middle Name + Street Where You First Lived)

Virginia Onyx

ROCK STAR ALIAS:
(Favorite Candy + Last Name Of Favorite Musician)

Starburst Alexakis

I got new sandals today... a pair of brown ones, a pair of white ones, and a pair of black ones. They're all in Mum's truck, hidden from Gary. He's of the mind that because I haven't been "aggressive" enough in my job searching, Mum shouldn't help me with buying my clothes, or shoes, or stuff like that. Sort of punishing me I guess.
. . .
My old sandals died. Five years of good service, but now they're worn out. It is TOO hot to be wearing full fledged shoes this summer. If I can't dress nice, with a nice, decent pair of sandals, how can I hope to impress prospective employers? Ah, well. He's pissed off, short temper, and mum doesn't want to deal with any crap from him so he's not to know about it.
I'll be getting new glasses soon. Two pairs! It's so funny because one pair is the thick rimmed black kind, and I swear it makes me think of Velma from Scooby Doo. But hey they're fun if a little unfamiliar... I used to wear plastic rimmed glasses all the time, 'til I hit about 12 and decided I didn't like them anymore. I do prefer wire-framed glasses.

Fin.

This is why you don't leave me to my own devices.

I need. A drink.
A song rushes past my lips

I need. A drink.
Why's she so dreamy?
There must be more than this provincial life!
Just watch I am going to make Belle my wife!

I love you too, Belle
Gaston. You fool.
You're such a prat.
And gay. You fucked up Frenchman you.

Where the hell is this going?!
I need six eggs!
That's what I was remembering
But I'm thirsty so I want a drink

This doesn't make sense!
What's wrong with it?
No force! No direction! No rhyming!
I suck at rhyming.
Where the hell is this going?!

This is not exactly a poem.
It was more of a soliloquy
Well, it was until you showed up
Bite me.
Is that an invitation?

Uhhh, I'm going out. If I don't come back, avenge my death!
Avenge it? I'm going to cause it...
*squ34k!*