xans

Taking on his surname makes my name sound incredibly posh. But I like it, even if I think it is going to take a few days/weeks/forever for it to sink in. I feel incredibly grown-up, despite not having a driver's license or owning a home... I'm married. He's no longer my partner, my fiancé, he's my husband. I'm rather wrapped that its legally done now.

(It's even consummated bwahaha)

And the last of our guests leave tomorrow morning, and we shall have the house back to ourselves, and our poor precious cat will stop fraeaking out about having her home invaded. Our wedding has been very non-traditional, but at the same time so very US, we have been very pleased by how it all went.

Yay!

I've always considered marriage to be like getting to have your best friend over for a sleepover... Every night.

Well, I've procrastinated liek whoa, but the fact of the matter is, I'm getting married in 9 days. (I become a step-mum to four adults when I do this, and 'grandmother' to nine grandchildren. We gotta come up with a hip grandma-name for me, lol. And not Nana Hana, because ew, I hate the word Nana.) I've been with Alan for five years now. Officially got engaged two years ago. Went through idea after idea of what I wanted, and found I hated the idea of stressing trying to sort out a venue, celebrant, clothes, rings, cake, etc. So anyway. Time flew by, but the date is now set.

We're getting married at a Registry on Monday the 26th of November. Having a family get together to eat & celebrate on Sunday the 25th of November. I have my dress, he has his outfit. No rings, but that's because I think I need a custom job and we both put that off for too long.

I'm not worried about that. The legal stuff is going to be done, the family is going to gather to wish us well. Those, I think, are the important bits.

Fin.

The tree is up! We had a note in the mail saying they would be cutting power today to do some linework so I thought I would use the time to put the tree up. The power never got cut off but I put the tree up anyway. It looks nice. I put a couple pictures up on my facebook of our cat snuggling on the tree skirt underneath.

My mum tells me she sent me her wedding dress in one of the parcels she sent me this year. I... don't remember ever getting any dresses from her. I honestly can't remember what her wedding dress looks like anyway, but I would have thought I'd remember that. But she insists she doesn't have it anymore and must have sent it to me. The possibility is that one parcel never arrived...

It came up as I showed her pictures of the dresses I like, and how I want a medieval/fantasy wedding. I told her how I'm pretty much in charge of planning it since it will mostly be "my" day. That's not to say it's not Alan's day and I won't listen to what he wants, but he's pretty easy-going about a lot of it. Not only that but this will be my first ever wedding, he's already been there and done that.

I have a job interview on Friday. Fingers crossed.

Fin.

Some more pictures, for your viewing pleasure. Because we're on crappy dial-up, I've tried not to upload a shitload 'cause it takes forever. But if you want to see more... lemme know. :P

( Again with the cutting! )

Fin.

Well! Yesterday was one very long, very cool day.

Got woken up quite early by dad, only, well, it was earlier than necessary but what the hey. I took the time to eat breakfast, anyway. Who knew in the next few hours when I'd next get a decent meal. (Really late, is when...) Anyway, off to some place to grab the flowers, and then dad and Iain dropped me and the flowers off at Suzy's eldest daughter Carla's. The boys then went and did things like fuss over the arrangement of chairs in the church and all that.

As for me... I got to have my hair straigtened, and the ends trimmed even courtesy of Carla the hairstylist. Then Laura, the next oldest daughter, did my nails. It didn't take her very long because my nails are in fairly good condition. Hee. Oh, and through this all we sat around drinking sparkling WHITE wine. Spillage would not be a fiasco. And it wasn't. Anyway, there was a girl over, Hannah, to do make-up but it was easy enough to do my own. The end results were "stunning" according to witnesses.

About 11 or so, I slipped into my (black) dress, did up my (black) fur wrap with a green broach, and put on my (black) shoes...wearing my black and white knee high socks. 'Cause it looked awesome. And I wore the ruby necklace dad gave me for my 21st and a pair of dangly earings with garnets. And when dad finally saw me I asked, "Is this enough colour for you?" because, despite having agreed on the black dress and everything a whole YEAR ago, he wasn't able to visualise how the little bits of colour would be more than adequate in fitting with the theme of things.

So, in the whole whole party of attendants, everyone wore as such: Suzy, the bride, wore a red dress, had a white fur wrap (that she didn't wear down the aisle but was needed in the chilly breezes at the gardens taking pictures) and sparkly whatsit shoes. Dad wore a black tux (long tails at the back, very cool), a red tie.... cowboy hat and possibly cowboy boots. Iain wore a matching tux with a green tie. I stood slightly taller than him in my shoes, hee, and I've already described what I wore.

Carla, Laura, and Rachel--Suzy's girls--wore green dresses...Laura's style was identical to mine, while Rachel and Carla had identical dresses in a strapless style...white fur wraps with broaches like mine, and shoes the same style as mine but goldy/silver instead of black. Savannah, that's Laura's daughter, was in a red dress with a white fur jacket held with a red broach, and shoes in the same style and colour as the girls. She also carried a little bag holding Suzy's glasses and such. Carla's little boy Izayah was in a smart little tux (that he got dirty at the gardens, lol) and he carried the rings. Amarah, only 19 months, was the cutest little thing in her wee red dress and white fur coat.

So we were running a little late trying to get all ready to go to the gardens to take pictures before the wedding. And I was hoping and crossing my fingers that any and all rain would hold the fuck off because my hair, damnit, just got straightened! Anyway, off to the gardens we went.

Well it's a good thing we hit up the Japanese garden first, because it meant we were under shelter when a light rain fell. It stopped, and off to the Chinese garden we went. Yadayadayada...then to the Italian renaissance garden. Iain hadn't actually seen the Indian garden, so he took a wee peek before we hit the Italian garden. That was all well and good, but by then it was 12 something or other and we were hungry. The parentals were taking forever with some set of pictures, and we asked if we were needed or could we bugger off to get some food before the ceremony.

Last thing we needed was a chorus of rumbling tummies from the front of the church in the middle of the wedding. We didn't have time to stop anywhere on the way, but we snuck some food off the afternoon tea tables before we had to go in. And thus...

Music played, everyone stands...the visiting pastor from Suzy's church walked in first, then Iain and me together, followed by Savannah and Izayah, then Carla holding Amarah, followed by Laura, and lastly Rachel. Full minute of music before Dad and Suzy made their entrance together. I think mostly I was interested in the reaction of Eileen when we finally got to the end, 'cause she hadn't seen me all prettied up and was definitely impressed. Big crowd--140-170 or something like that, and there was maybe a handful that I knew so getting reactions from them were the most important. Hee.

The ceremony was good. Enough light moments and not too heavy on the word of God and such... 'cause, nothing against God and all that, but my eyes would have glazed over if one went to far with it. There was this funny story of 'Elain and Roger' while the registry was being signed... Dad and Suzy with Laura and Iain as witnesses--funnily enough both those children are the left handed ones--using MY pen. Hee.

And finally it was all over, and Dad and Suzy...danced down the aisle. It was cool 'cause most the people weren't expecting it. They were surprised, amused, and it brought on applause so hey. Then we followed, stood in a greeting line that took forever... grace was said, the cake cut, and we all dug into the food. Wandered around a fair amount, thankfully no one stood on the back of my dress (a hazard, since it drags on the ground and it happened often enough at the resident's ball last year).

More pictures were taken, including one of me alone showing off my striped stockings. Someone was saying, it was funny when they took the picture of all of us at the alter or whatsit, 'cause we happen to be in very Christmasy colours (it's the middle of winter; it works!) and they even had elf socks thanks to me. Hehe.

I had a headache by the end of it all. Not enough to drink, too much sugar in my system, and I hadn't been wearing my glasses all day. Definitely tired and the headache just made it worse. And then... it was over.

Loaded wedding presents into Rachel's car, she dropped us and the presents off at Dad's while she and Laura and Savannah went home... for all of five minutes Iain and I made an attempt at catalogging what they got and from whom, but it got boring... I did go through all the cards and such, 'cause one thing Suzy and Dad asked for was Farmers vouchers so's they can buy a new fridge. I mean, seriously, they've already got two functional households and don't need a lot of the traditional wedding gifts. Anyway, I added it up... $1040 in Farmers vouchers, $90 in Briscoes, $10 Green Gardens, as well as $105 in cash. PLUS a shit load of other gifts. When I texted that to dad they were speechless... utterly overwhelmed at people's generousity.

And at the end of all this, I ended up going to visit my mate Gino, and we all got indian for tea (chicken tikka masala, mmmm) and went back to watch Extras and some other funny shit. I, apparently, do not exist because I found these GI Joe fake clips funny where most girls think they're just stupid. No, definitely funny. This other girl Evelyn thought so too, but we musn't be true girls or something. Possibly a compliment, or just too good to be true for these poor, sad lads. And Gino confirmed I'm a total geek for having a stick of RAM on a keyring. (I thank shiseiji for getting me that...)

And by midnight I was asleep.

Fin.

Dad's getting married August 12. Yarr. I'll be in Hamilton for about four days around then. And I have to wait 'til then to get my birthday presents from him, same as I gotta wait for mine from pandoras_evil_t. I just hope I won't be given a late birthday party plus ceremonial 21st Speeches that make me wanna roll my eyes and possibly hit someone. No speeches for my birthday, bitches.

Just four more days 'til that!

Also, I took this quiz:

You Should Date A Swede!

You're a romantic, albeit an understated and practical one. It's more about a steady partnership for you, not unrestrained falling Your Swede will give you the unwavering love you crave While making up some mean pancakes and meatballs on the side!

Am amused, and my first thought was of Sven from the Georgia Nicolson books. But somehow I doubt Rosie would be willing to hand him over, since he's a capital snogger and such. Hee.

Enjoying the nice weather while it lasts. Pretty sun. Yeah, that's all I got for now.

Fin.

Henry: Do you really think there is only one perfect mate?
Leonardo da Vinci: As a matter of fact, I do.
Henry: Well then how can you be certain to find them? And if you do finally find them, are they really the one for you or do you only think they are? And what happens if the person you're supposed to be with never appears, or she does, but you're too distracted to notice?
Leonardo da Vinci: You learn to pay attention.
Henry: Then let's say God puts two people on Earth and they are lucky enough to find one another. But one of them gets hit by lightning. Well then what? Is that it? Or, perchance, you meet someone new and marry all over again. Is that the lady you're supposed to be with or was it the first? And if so, when the two of them were walking side by side were they both the one for you and you just happened to meet the first one first or was the second one supposed to be first? And is everything just chance or are some things meant to be?

I recently spoke to a friend of mine with whom I had no conversed with in a while. Apparently she's got a new boyfriend, and he's THE ONE, her soulmate, she's felt complete since she met him, etc., etc., ad nasuem. I'd be more happy for her, if I weren't so bloody doubtful. Having not spoken in some time, I thought, oh, this happened months ago. No. This happened a week and a half ago, and thus enters my doubt and disbelief. I just... I have a hard time believing in people my age (especially girls; they'll be the soonest to claim it) having found The One. No matter how romantic he's being.

That is not to suggest it's not possible. Indeed not. I stongly believe in, say, shiseiji and Matt being an excellent match please, please, please be okay, and both are younger than I. They've also been together at least two to two & a half years and been reasonably stable throughout. If they said they were meant to be, they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together, I'd say finally! However, I wouldn't say it if they'd announced that a week into their relationship.

It just seems to me that many girls my age seem to claim that they've found love and he loves her so much, he must be the one... I mean, shit, I fell in love once. Got my heart broken even. But, I don't think I ever believed Judah was The One omgsquee4eva!!!!11!! or that we'd end up getting married and spending the rest of our lives together. (Funnily enough, he was married by the time he was 20 to the girl he chose over me) I think it takes more time than a lot of people take, to be sure of one's feelings about a relationship, or that it's 'meant to be.' How can anyone truly claim to love, to be in love, with someone that they've been with and known for only a short time? It's awfully extreme. One of the things I hated when I was with Jason back when we were 14 was how quickly he started saying, "I love you" and how I felt pressured to reply the same even though I knew I most certainly did not.

I despise the word love sometimes, or how easily it gets misused and misunderstood. Not to mention the many different types of love--there really ought to be more words to descibe them, like how the Greeks had the three words for it. If it's not misunderstanding when using the word love in a non-romantic sense (like pandoras_evil_t specifying she loves me as a sister), saying you don't love someone often gets such a wrong reaction too. As if it's impossible to merely like someone to varying degrees, lesser than those of love.

If I were to say that I don't love Peter--and I don't...yet--I'd have to expand that statement to include the facts that I do like him--a lot--and that yes, there could be a possiblity that one day I might love him, or I'd sound like a heartless bitch undeserving of his attention. (I struggle with believing he'll give me any attention, deserved or undeserved shh... ignore my insecurities and fear of rejection.) Though, I'm sure I'd rather come off sounding heartless and undeserving, than be another headless chicken proclaiming to the heavens that, oh beauty divine, joy of joys, love hath found me, and forever may it last.

Such sappiness, especially this early on, is unbecoming. What am I saying? May I never, no matter how enthralled I may become, never sound so sooky and wet.

Fin.

Since when, really, do we actually need to depend on someone else for our happiness? I admit, having someone special is bloody nice. But we don't need them. This sort of dependence on outside sources for happiness is... silly. 'Cause if I can't make myself feel better, how can I expect anyone else to give a shit? (Bright Eyes)
So, in a way, this is the lonliest Valentine's Day I've had yet. Also, the most painful. I mean, who doesn't just love getting up in the morning to be greeted by Aunt Flo? I know this day has a red theme but that's just a little extreme, thank you. The cramps weren't very welcome, either.
Anyway, I didn't particularly feel like commiserating with other single friends (not that I have too many here at the moment.) I'm not really in a 'Boys suck and they should all be castrated!' mood. And I didn't really have a special someone to spend it with. No surprises there. Hamilton is hardly the social capital in the summer when everyone's off home, or at the beach, or anywhere but the City of the Future. I didn't get any gifts, but then, I didn't give any, either. And that's okay.
For all it's been a lonely Valentine's, I didn't really think about it. I mean, I knew Dad and Suzie would be doing something. And that's it. Eileen and I laughed a bit at the news and all the flower delivery stuff. *shrugs* No chocolates, no cards, no flowers, no S.O.'s. Love, romantic love, is hardly central to my life at this point.
I very nearly could have forgotten it was Valentines. But that would mean not reading lj and not watching the news and being oh so anti-social. Yeah, I'm not that anti-Valentines. I don't care too much either way, anymore. I find getting angsty and bitter about it is a bit excessive, really.
Anyway, I hope you have/had a fine Valentine's Day yourself.

Fin.