I'll give you a sound slap
May. 16th, 2004 06:56 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
xansThere's a girl at my school a lot like you. She probably doesn't have a very nice homelife, but almost any time I've spoken with her she says things about how she's not pretty enough, or smart enough, or good enough. And it's not true.
Sure, she's no babe, but Lincoln once said something along the lines of the fact that God likes average-looking people because there's so many of them. It's true. I've seen your picture; you're attractive enough. You don't need to be some tall, skinny, large breasted, large reared, blonde-haired blue eyed supermodel. I hate the fact that most women's magazines and fasions are made by women and gay men. Why are we trying to appeal to the two forces with no interest in us, at least, sexually?
Now, I know it's hard in your classes with your teachers always handing your stuff back with bad grades. This is not a reflection of your talent, nor your ability to work. It is simply the fact that you're not writing or drawing what the teacher wants. This isn't your fault. The fault lies in your teachers. They expect too much of you; they expect you to telepathically leech from their minds what it is they want. They expect the impossible. That is not to say that it can't be done. It can. But it's not your job to prove them wrong on a permanent basis. Never think it is.
Always, when I read your journals, I hear about another trial and tribulation on the school or home front. Now, I know that things may seem bad, but I think there's too much pessimism speaking. Maybe you're a born pessimist, maybe you're not. I don't know. What I know is that I'm always optimistic, even when I'm feeling my worst. I read your journals, and I try to encourage you, I look at your works or I don't, depending on my mood, and it annoys me to hear you criticize yourself. You are far too critical of yourself, ****. I remember another quote, "We must strive to be our own best friends, for too often we turn out to be our own worst enemies."
What I'm asking, ****, is to stop thinking in the negative. I realize you don't have a nice home front, or school front. But I bet it's not as bad as you perceive. Also remember that we are given many trials in our lives, and it is our choice whether we let them make or break us. Don't let your trials break you, ****. Be strong, because you can. Take the word can't out of your mind. "If you think you can, you can. And if you think you can't, you're right." It's all about belief, perception. What do you believe? Maybe, maybe it's time to change that belief.
Now, don't think I've stopped liking you, or reading your journal, or looking at your art because of this. But often times, I've found that when I'm given into the confidence of others who feel down trodden, that they often need a sound slap instead of the sympathy they think they need. Forgive me if I sound brash, or tactless. I've never been good at veiling my feelings behind soft words. I believe you are a good person, ****. If you feel you haven't the strength, then pray to God for it. He never turns his back on his Children. You may think he has, but I'd bet he'd tell you that it was you who turned your back on him.
Yours in the light,
Hana
Boy am I tired or am I sick. No, seriously. I'm both. I may have got close to ten hours of sleep but I wish I could have got more. And then I think I may have got something from one of the girls... Ali and Hen were both sick at least.
Well, when I got up, I fussed with my hair and put it into twin buns, and eventally painted my names a dark pinkish red. But I didn't really get started until about two.
That's when I began putting on make up. I had absolutely no idea what I was going to do. I ended up with all the normal stuff, you know, foundation, powder, blush, etc, before working on my eyes. For my eyes I used a little bit of brown eye-liner, and then I put sparkly silver-white eye shadow between my eyebrows and the tops of my eyelids. Then I shadowed the eyelids in a dark grey-blue. It turned out to look very good, and even kind of Asian. Oh, and then I applied bright red lipstick.
Somewhere in all that, mum came home and handed me two long red ribbons like I'd asked her to get. I tied them on the buns and got into the dress and stuff. I'd had the idea to have red ribbons, but hadn't said anything until my friend Bethany also suggested it. In my mind I sort of had the image that it would kind of like Chun-Li from Street Fighter. (Although I couldn't remember her name... it took someone at Prom to remember it)
Although the slits on my dress don't got quite as high. Still, the slits did go up to just above mid-tigh or so. Hehe.
Well, Alicia showed up at about twenty to three and we went off to the theatres. Ah, Troy. Troy, Troy, Troy. It wasn't nearly as gory as I thought it might be, nor was the nudity really revealing. And sure, my memory of the Iliad is such that I only remembered the bare bones of the story. I just kind of waited for Achilles to die, because I remembered that much. Oh, but it was great when he gave this little speech on the gods envying humans their mortality, because it was sooo... gee, I wonder if Brad Pitt's ever played other roles where he was the immortal one envying the humans? :P Yeah, there was the sad part where Achilles is dying which just happened to be a moment that Ali, with her cold, sniffled. So I made fun of her by patting her shoulder like I was saying, "There, there." Of course, when the movie was over, she asked me what else Odysseus was in and at first I misunderstood her. Then I realized she was talking about the actor, Sean Bean, rather than the character. When I said Boromir, she was like, "Of course! I kept wondering why I got a Lord of the Rings vibe from him.."
We then went to this little Teriyaki place, Down East, for dinner. I got halibut and fries while she got chicken teriyaki. And dinner was nice. She started to get a little absent minded, though, where she went to leave without paying (thus confusing me because we'd only left the tip on the table), and then she'd forgotten her camera at the table. I was able to be her memory, asking if she'd grabbed it. It would have sucked if she'd left it behind.
We went back to her place, where her parents were home from seeing... um, what's that movie... the one with Julianne Moore and Pierce Brosnan. It's like, Rules of Attraction... I think. Anyway, that's what they saw. So we went upstairs so she could get ready. Her dress does ~not~ like me. It kept catching things in the zipper on her little top.
Of course before we left her parents had to take a bunch of pictures (I already went through that before I left home to see Troy with Ali.). And then Ali and I made her mom feel short as I took a picture of Ali with her 'rents. After that, we went back to my place to pick up the corsages.
Apparently my parents took last night as an opportunity to eat out for once, and hadn't known if I had my keys or not. Still, I had them and used them to put the cheap digital camera and my glasses back inside (I'd had them just for watching the movie. They were ~very~ out of place with my outfit). Then we grabbed the boxes with the corsages and were on our way to the Base. I had my school ID, and not knowing if that was valid enough had wisely brought my passport as backup. Thankfully, I neither needed it, nor lost it.
Anyway, as we stepped out of the elevator Mr. Quinn took one look at me and said, "That is the most unique dress I've seen tonight." *giggles* I got sooo many compliments for my outfit. Nobody had anything like it (which was the idea) and so I had to say a lot of modest "Thank you"s while at the same time admiring other girls' dresses. Of course I got professional pictures, and as I walked past a pair of chaperones who happened to be Asian women, well, they really liked my dress. *grins*
It was our group who started people dancing, by being the first ones to move onto the dance floor. I'd already felt like the rebel when after my pictures I walked across the floor to our table rather than around it. Anyway, people tended to yell at me for a while because I was taking pictures, and the flash, well, it blinds. I know. Kamille took it and flashed it right in my face. *grins* I took it all in good fun. Well, once Crispy, Biz, Shanny and Kris showed up, my camera ran out of film.
Well, I had a lot of fun dancing for a lot of it, but then the music turned bad. It was too much hip-hop, and too much hip-hop that wasn't v. popular or recognizable. So I spent the rest of the time at the dance talking with Ashtyn's date Pete about drinking, and Spanish. Ali of course ended up feeling kind of put out because most everyone had dates (A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle, damnit!) and so she was kind of alone on the dance floor. Well, once Ash, Hen, and their dates decided to leave, Ali and I thought we'd leave too.
So, not wanting to wait for a table at Sharis--much as their dessert pies appealed--we went through the drive-thru at Wendy's and had our midnight snack at the Waterfront. And finally she took me home.
So, I came home, took a shower and cleaned up, then sat in bed 'til nearly two finishing off the Stone of Tears. I just needed to really exhaust myself. I'd been kind of wired and such. I figured it was all right since I didn't need to be up at any particular time.
Mum woke me up at about ten-thirty, which bugged me. I could have slept for hours more. Thing is, my step-grandma and her friend are over now for a little barbeque. Grandma Bloom gave me a pair of disposable cameras and $100 as my grad gifts. *yawns* Man I'm v. tired... zzz.
Fin.
Sure, she's no babe, but Lincoln once said something along the lines of the fact that God likes average-looking people because there's so many of them. It's true. I've seen your picture; you're attractive enough. You don't need to be some tall, skinny, large breasted, large reared, blonde-haired blue eyed supermodel. I hate the fact that most women's magazines and fasions are made by women and gay men. Why are we trying to appeal to the two forces with no interest in us, at least, sexually?
Now, I know it's hard in your classes with your teachers always handing your stuff back with bad grades. This is not a reflection of your talent, nor your ability to work. It is simply the fact that you're not writing or drawing what the teacher wants. This isn't your fault. The fault lies in your teachers. They expect too much of you; they expect you to telepathically leech from their minds what it is they want. They expect the impossible. That is not to say that it can't be done. It can. But it's not your job to prove them wrong on a permanent basis. Never think it is.
Always, when I read your journals, I hear about another trial and tribulation on the school or home front. Now, I know that things may seem bad, but I think there's too much pessimism speaking. Maybe you're a born pessimist, maybe you're not. I don't know. What I know is that I'm always optimistic, even when I'm feeling my worst. I read your journals, and I try to encourage you, I look at your works or I don't, depending on my mood, and it annoys me to hear you criticize yourself. You are far too critical of yourself, ****. I remember another quote, "We must strive to be our own best friends, for too often we turn out to be our own worst enemies."
What I'm asking, ****, is to stop thinking in the negative. I realize you don't have a nice home front, or school front. But I bet it's not as bad as you perceive. Also remember that we are given many trials in our lives, and it is our choice whether we let them make or break us. Don't let your trials break you, ****. Be strong, because you can. Take the word can't out of your mind. "If you think you can, you can. And if you think you can't, you're right." It's all about belief, perception. What do you believe? Maybe, maybe it's time to change that belief.
Now, don't think I've stopped liking you, or reading your journal, or looking at your art because of this. But often times, I've found that when I'm given into the confidence of others who feel down trodden, that they often need a sound slap instead of the sympathy they think they need. Forgive me if I sound brash, or tactless. I've never been good at veiling my feelings behind soft words. I believe you are a good person, ****. If you feel you haven't the strength, then pray to God for it. He never turns his back on his Children. You may think he has, but I'd bet he'd tell you that it was you who turned your back on him.
Yours in the light,
Hana
Boy am I tired or am I sick. No, seriously. I'm both. I may have got close to ten hours of sleep but I wish I could have got more. And then I think I may have got something from one of the girls... Ali and Hen were both sick at least.
Well, when I got up, I fussed with my hair and put it into twin buns, and eventally painted my names a dark pinkish red. But I didn't really get started until about two.
That's when I began putting on make up. I had absolutely no idea what I was going to do. I ended up with all the normal stuff, you know, foundation, powder, blush, etc, before working on my eyes. For my eyes I used a little bit of brown eye-liner, and then I put sparkly silver-white eye shadow between my eyebrows and the tops of my eyelids. Then I shadowed the eyelids in a dark grey-blue. It turned out to look very good, and even kind of Asian. Oh, and then I applied bright red lipstick.
Somewhere in all that, mum came home and handed me two long red ribbons like I'd asked her to get. I tied them on the buns and got into the dress and stuff. I'd had the idea to have red ribbons, but hadn't said anything until my friend Bethany also suggested it. In my mind I sort of had the image that it would kind of like Chun-Li from Street Fighter. (Although I couldn't remember her name... it took someone at Prom to remember it)
Although the slits on my dress don't got quite as high. Still, the slits did go up to just above mid-tigh or so. Hehe.
Well, Alicia showed up at about twenty to three and we went off to the theatres. Ah, Troy. Troy, Troy, Troy. It wasn't nearly as gory as I thought it might be, nor was the nudity really revealing. And sure, my memory of the Iliad is such that I only remembered the bare bones of the story. I just kind of waited for Achilles to die, because I remembered that much. Oh, but it was great when he gave this little speech on the gods envying humans their mortality, because it was sooo... gee, I wonder if Brad Pitt's ever played other roles where he was the immortal one envying the humans? :P Yeah, there was the sad part where Achilles is dying which just happened to be a moment that Ali, with her cold, sniffled. So I made fun of her by patting her shoulder like I was saying, "There, there." Of course, when the movie was over, she asked me what else Odysseus was in and at first I misunderstood her. Then I realized she was talking about the actor, Sean Bean, rather than the character. When I said Boromir, she was like, "Of course! I kept wondering why I got a Lord of the Rings vibe from him.."
We then went to this little Teriyaki place, Down East, for dinner. I got halibut and fries while she got chicken teriyaki. And dinner was nice. She started to get a little absent minded, though, where she went to leave without paying (thus confusing me because we'd only left the tip on the table), and then she'd forgotten her camera at the table. I was able to be her memory, asking if she'd grabbed it. It would have sucked if she'd left it behind.
We went back to her place, where her parents were home from seeing... um, what's that movie... the one with Julianne Moore and Pierce Brosnan. It's like, Rules of Attraction... I think. Anyway, that's what they saw. So we went upstairs so she could get ready. Her dress does ~not~ like me. It kept catching things in the zipper on her little top.
Of course before we left her parents had to take a bunch of pictures (I already went through that before I left home to see Troy with Ali.). And then Ali and I made her mom feel short as I took a picture of Ali with her 'rents. After that, we went back to my place to pick up the corsages.
Apparently my parents took last night as an opportunity to eat out for once, and hadn't known if I had my keys or not. Still, I had them and used them to put the cheap digital camera and my glasses back inside (I'd had them just for watching the movie. They were ~very~ out of place with my outfit). Then we grabbed the boxes with the corsages and were on our way to the Base. I had my school ID, and not knowing if that was valid enough had wisely brought my passport as backup. Thankfully, I neither needed it, nor lost it.
Anyway, as we stepped out of the elevator Mr. Quinn took one look at me and said, "That is the most unique dress I've seen tonight." *giggles* I got sooo many compliments for my outfit. Nobody had anything like it (which was the idea) and so I had to say a lot of modest "Thank you"s while at the same time admiring other girls' dresses. Of course I got professional pictures, and as I walked past a pair of chaperones who happened to be Asian women, well, they really liked my dress. *grins*
It was our group who started people dancing, by being the first ones to move onto the dance floor. I'd already felt like the rebel when after my pictures I walked across the floor to our table rather than around it. Anyway, people tended to yell at me for a while because I was taking pictures, and the flash, well, it blinds. I know. Kamille took it and flashed it right in my face. *grins* I took it all in good fun. Well, once Crispy, Biz, Shanny and Kris showed up, my camera ran out of film.
Well, I had a lot of fun dancing for a lot of it, but then the music turned bad. It was too much hip-hop, and too much hip-hop that wasn't v. popular or recognizable. So I spent the rest of the time at the dance talking with Ashtyn's date Pete about drinking, and Spanish. Ali of course ended up feeling kind of put out because most everyone had dates (A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle, damnit!) and so she was kind of alone on the dance floor. Well, once Ash, Hen, and their dates decided to leave, Ali and I thought we'd leave too.
So, not wanting to wait for a table at Sharis--much as their dessert pies appealed--we went through the drive-thru at Wendy's and had our midnight snack at the Waterfront. And finally she took me home.
So, I came home, took a shower and cleaned up, then sat in bed 'til nearly two finishing off the Stone of Tears. I just needed to really exhaust myself. I'd been kind of wired and such. I figured it was all right since I didn't need to be up at any particular time.
Mum woke me up at about ten-thirty, which bugged me. I could have slept for hours more. Thing is, my step-grandma and her friend are over now for a little barbeque. Grandma Bloom gave me a pair of disposable cameras and $100 as my grad gifts. *yawns* Man I'm v. tired... zzz.
Fin.
